Chapter 40

Chapter 40: Part One — Scarlett

Chapter 40: Part One — Scarlett

The Summer Festival had taken over the school grounds and the adjacent park with the cheerful thoroughness of a benign invasion - strings of warm lights looped between the trees, food stalls filling the air with competing smells of grilled things and sugar, games set up in the wide spaces between, a small stage at the far end where a band was beginning to tune up. The whole of it glowed in the late-afternoon gold, and the crowds moved through it with the specific ease of people who have been given official permission to stop doing the things they're supposed to do.

Leo had been to festivals before, in the old world, and they had always made him feel pleasantly anonymous - one body in a crowd, nobody's particular concern. Here the anonymity lasted roughly until the second person recognized him, which was about ninety seconds, and he would have been swallowed by the usual orbit of attention if Scarlett had not materialized at his elbow at precisely the right moment and said, in a tone that brooked approximately zero argument: "This way," and steered him firmly down a side path and away from the main entrance crowd.

"Thank you," Leo said.

"I know the back routes," Scarlett said, which was both true and an understatement - she had, he gathered, been involved in organizing this festival for two years running and knew its layout with the precision of someone who had personally approved the placement of every stall. She walked with him through a quieter section of the grounds, between the food stalls and the edge of the park, where the lights were still warm but the crowd was thinner, and Leo felt the familiar relief of not being watched, mixed now with something new: the awareness of who was walking beside him.

Her hair was down. He'd noticed it at the gate and he kept noticing it, peripherally, in the way you notice a thing that is familiar in an unexpected form. It changed her, slightly - softened the precise lines of her public face, made her look younger and less defended. She'd worn the summer dress with a small cardigan over it, which was so entirely Scarlett - unwilling to be wholly without armor, but letting the armor be softer tonight - that it made him smile.

"You look nice," he said, because it was true and he saw no reason not to say it.

Scarlett tripped.

Not badly - she caught herself immediately, with the practiced self-possession of a person who does not fall, but she caught herself over flat ground with nothing to have tripped on, and Leo, who was a noticer, noticed. He said nothing, because she would have hated him to notice, but he made a note of it: something in her had lurched at the compliment the way it always lurched at the unexpected kindnesses, and he found himself glad, as he often did with her, that she couldn't see what he was thinking.

"Thank you," Scarlett said, with immense composure, as though she had not just nearly walked into the ground. "You look - you also - the shirt is -" she stopped, recalibrated, concluded: "Fine. You look fine."

"Thank you," Leo said gravely.

"Don't," she said.

He didn't.

They found a spot that Scarlett knew, because of course she knew - a small clearing slightly off the main paths where you could see the lights but not be too deep in the crowd, with a low stone wall to sit on and a clear line to a food stall that smelled extraordinary. She had, Leo suspected, been to this spot in advance and vetted it, possibly with a clipboard. He loved this about her. He was aware of loving this about her with the uncomplicated clarity that had been arriving more frequently lately.

"Food?" he asked.

"Obviously," Scarlett said.

He went to the stall and came back with two cups of something warm that turned out to be a spiced cider, and a paper bag of small pastries that smelled like brown butter and autumn even though it was summer, and he handed her half with the same automatic attentiveness with which he always handed her things - the right amount, the right portion, here, eat this - and she took it, and they sat on the low stone wall in the warm gold light, and Scarlett Vance ate a festival pastry, and it was, by her own private accounting, one of the best moments of the year.

They talked. Not about Council, not about school, not about any of the things they usually had to hand as topics - the organizing, the managing, the always-useful task. About nothing in particular, the way people talk when they've given themselves permission to stop being productive for one evening. He asked her about her favorite season - autumn, because of the organizational satisfaction of things completing themselves - and she asked him about his - also autumn, which surprised them both and then, somehow, made perfect sense. She told him about a book she'd read as a child that had lodged in her in some way she'd never quite resolved, and he told her about a terrible film he'd watched repeatedly for reasons he couldn't justify, and it was not a conversation that accomplished anything, and it was the best kind.

And then a child ran past, chasing something, and knocked into the nearest stall, and a tower of small plastic prizes began a slow wobbling collapse, and Leo set down his cider and went and caught it - three armfuls, swiftly gathered, arranged back into a semblance of order while the stall-holder fluttered and the child looked mortified - and came back and sat down and picked up his cider again, and Scarlett was looking at him with an expression he'd learned to recognize, the one she wore when he'd done something that fit him completely and that she'd never seen done by anyone else.

"You can't stop," she said.

"Stop what?"

"Noticing things. Doing things. It's completely involuntary, isn't it. Something tilts and you're already moving."

"I guess so," Leo said, a little self-conscious. "It's just - it needed catching."

"Everything needs catching," Scarlett said quietly. "Most people don't notice. Or they notice and decide it's not their problem."

He looked at her sidelong. "You notice."

"I notice," she agreed. "But I -" she paused, and he thought she was going to retreat, and she didn't. "I notice and I assign it. Put it in the relevant category, delegate or action accordingly." A beat. "You notice and you just - catch it. Before you've decided to. There's no assignment. There's no category. It's just - you move."

"Is that a bad thing?"

"No," Scarlett said, and the word came out softer than she'd intended. "It's the most disarming thing I've ever encountered, if you want to know the truth. I've spent ten years building systems to manage every variable, and you are the only variable I have ever met that simply refuses to be managed, because you're not doing anything - you're just being a person, and it keeps not fitting in any folder I have."

Leo was quiet for a moment. "Do you want it to fit in a folder?"

Scarlett looked at her pastry. "I wanted it to fit in a folder," she said. "For quite some time. It was very inconvenient." A pause, and then, in a different register, the honest one she reached for more lately: "I don't anymore. Want it to fit. I think I'd rather have a thing that doesn't fit than go back to all the folders and nothing in them that - " she stopped.

"Nothing in them that what?"

"That matters like this," Scarlett said, and looked up, and looked at him, and for once, for one clear moment, everything she usually kept behind glass was right there in the open - the wanting and the fear and the unfamiliar hope and the Scarlett underneath the President, all of it, simply present, simply hers.

Leo looked back at her, and something in his chest settled like something that had been waiting to land.

He didn't say anything. He didn't need to. He just held her gaze for a beat, warm and unhurried, the way he held the things he was given without squeezing them - and then he offered her the last pastry, which she took, and they sat in the warm lights and finished their cider, and didn't speak for a little while, and the silence was the most comfortable either of them had known.

The time moved faster than Leo wanted it to. He was aware of the schedule in his pocket - had been aware of it throughout, the faint guilty undercurrent of the evening - and as five-thirty approached he felt the thing he'd half expected: the reluctance. Not wanting to go. The awareness that the ninety minutes had been real, exactly as real as he'd hoped, and that the leaving would feel like cutting a thread before it had finished.

"I should -" he started.

"Go," Scarlett said, and it was clear she'd felt the shift, the way she always felt everything a moment before it arrived. "You have somewhere to be."

The way she said it was not a question, and it had a quality to it - not hurt, not accusatory, but simply knowing - that gave him a prickle of unease. But she said it evenly, and she looked at him evenly, and she did not ask where, and he did not explain, and the moment passed.

"I had a really good evening," Leo said, and meant it completely. "This bit of it. I really did, Scarlett."

Something moved through her face, brief and unguarded. "So did I."

He stood, and she stood, and he did what he'd done that morning, the thing that came from the new Leo, the one who'd stopped running from real things: he put his arms around her, briefly, warm, and held her for a moment in the festival lights.

She held back.

He stepped away. She let him go. And he went - carrying the warmth of it, and the guilt of the schedule, in equal measure - toward the part of the festival where Aria was waiting.

Behind him, Scarlett stood alone in the small clearing by the low stone wall, in her summer dress and her softer armor, and watched him go, and held, very carefully, everything that had been said and not said.

And she knew, with the particular knowing of a person who manages everything and has therefore learned to read the shape of what's coming, that something was not quite right about the evening - that the somewhere to be had a texture to it that didn't feel like just another commitment. She could not have said what it was. She filed it, as she filed things she didn't yet understand, under pending, and let him go, and stood in the warm lights, and told herself that whatever it was, she would handle it when it arrived.

The evening continued around her, bright and indifferent.

At the other end of the festival grounds, barely a quarter-mile away, Aria Blake was bouncing on her heels at the entrance to the games section, checking her phone, starting to glow with anticipation.

And in the garden district across town, in a small flat over a flower shop, Chloe Vance was putting on her best cardigan and having her forty-fifth argument with her reflection, and losing.

And in the Sterling residence, composing herself in the back of a car, Veronica Sterling was staring at her own hands - clean today, no garden dirt - and thinking about trying.

You've reached the end of this chapter

Chapter 40

Chapter 40: Part One — Scarlett

Chapter 40: Part One — Scarlett

The Summer Festival had taken over the school grounds and the adjacent park with the cheerful thoroughness of a benign invasion - strings of warm lights looped between the trees, food stalls filling the air with competing smells of grilled things and sugar, games set up in the wide spaces between, a small stage at the far end where a band was beginning to tune up. The whole of it glowed in the late-afternoon gold, and the crowds moved through it with the specific ease of people who have been given official permission to stop doing the things they're supposed to do.

Leo had been to festivals before, in the old world, and they had always made him feel pleasantly anonymous - one body in a crowd, nobody's particular concern. Here the anonymity lasted roughly until the second person recognized him, which was about ninety seconds, and he would have been swallowed by the usual orbit of attention if Scarlett had not materialized at his elbow at precisely the right moment and said, in a tone that brooked approximately zero argument: "This way," and steered him firmly down a side path and away from the main entrance crowd.

"Thank you," Leo said.

"I know the back routes," Scarlett said, which was both true and an understatement - she had, he gathered, been involved in organizing this festival for two years running and knew its layout with the precision of someone who had personally approved the placement of every stall. She walked with him through a quieter section of the grounds, between the food stalls and the edge of the park, where the lights were still warm but the crowd was thinner, and Leo felt the familiar relief of not being watched, mixed now with something new: the awareness of who was walking beside him.

Her hair was down. He'd noticed it at the gate and he kept noticing it, peripherally, in the way you notice a thing that is familiar in an unexpected form. It changed her, slightly - softened the precise lines of her public face, made her look younger and less defended. She'd worn the summer dress with a small cardigan over it, which was so entirely Scarlett - unwilling to be wholly without armor, but letting the armor be softer tonight - that it made him smile.

"You look nice," he said, because it was true and he saw no reason not to say it.

Scarlett tripped.

Not badly - she caught herself immediately, with the practiced self-possession of a person who does not fall, but she caught herself over flat ground with nothing to have tripped on, and Leo, who was a noticer, noticed. He said nothing, because she would have hated him to notice, but he made a note of it: something in her had lurched at the compliment the way it always lurched at the unexpected kindnesses, and he found himself glad, as he often did with her, that she couldn't see what he was thinking.

"Thank you," Scarlett said, with immense composure, as though she had not just nearly walked into the ground. "You look - you also - the shirt is -" she stopped, recalibrated, concluded: "Fine. You look fine."

"Thank you," Leo said gravely.

"Don't," she said.

He didn't.

They found a spot that Scarlett knew, because of course she knew - a small clearing slightly off the main paths where you could see the lights but not be too deep in the crowd, with a low stone wall to sit on and a clear line to a food stall that smelled extraordinary. She had, Leo suspected, been to this spot in advance and vetted it, possibly with a clipboard. He loved this about her. He was aware of loving this about her with the uncomplicated clarity that had been arriving more frequently lately.

"Food?" he asked.

"Obviously," Scarlett said.

He went to the stall and came back with two cups of something warm that turned out to be a spiced cider, and a paper bag of small pastries that smelled like brown butter and autumn even though it was summer, and he handed her half with the same automatic attentiveness with which he always handed her things - the right amount, the right portion, here, eat this - and she took it, and they sat on the low stone wall in the warm gold light, and Scarlett Vance ate a festival pastry, and it was, by her own private accounting, one of the best moments of the year.

They talked. Not about Council, not about school, not about any of the things they usually had to hand as topics - the organizing, the managing, the always-useful task. About nothing in particular, the way people talk when they've given themselves permission to stop being productive for one evening. He asked her about her favorite season - autumn, because of the organizational satisfaction of things completing themselves - and she asked him about his - also autumn, which surprised them both and then, somehow, made perfect sense. She told him about a book she'd read as a child that had lodged in her in some way she'd never quite resolved, and he told her about a terrible film he'd watched repeatedly for reasons he couldn't justify, and it was not a conversation that accomplished anything, and it was the best kind.

And then a child ran past, chasing something, and knocked into the nearest stall, and a tower of small plastic prizes began a slow wobbling collapse, and Leo set down his cider and went and caught it - three armfuls, swiftly gathered, arranged back into a semblance of order while the stall-holder fluttered and the child looked mortified - and came back and sat down and picked up his cider again, and Scarlett was looking at him with an expression he'd learned to recognize, the one she wore when he'd done something that fit him completely and that she'd never seen done by anyone else.

"You can't stop," she said.

"Stop what?"

"Noticing things. Doing things. It's completely involuntary, isn't it. Something tilts and you're already moving."

"I guess so," Leo said, a little self-conscious. "It's just - it needed catching."

"Everything needs catching," Scarlett said quietly. "Most people don't notice. Or they notice and decide it's not their problem."

He looked at her sidelong. "You notice."

"I notice," she agreed. "But I -" she paused, and he thought she was going to retreat, and she didn't. "I notice and I assign it. Put it in the relevant category, delegate or action accordingly." A beat. "You notice and you just - catch it. Before you've decided to. There's no assignment. There's no category. It's just - you move."

"Is that a bad thing?"

"No," Scarlett said, and the word came out softer than she'd intended. "It's the most disarming thing I've ever encountered, if you want to know the truth. I've spent ten years building systems to manage every variable, and you are the only variable I have ever met that simply refuses to be managed, because you're not doing anything - you're just being a person, and it keeps not fitting in any folder I have."

Leo was quiet for a moment. "Do you want it to fit in a folder?"

Scarlett looked at her pastry. "I wanted it to fit in a folder," she said. "For quite some time. It was very inconvenient." A pause, and then, in a different register, the honest one she reached for more lately: "I don't anymore. Want it to fit. I think I'd rather have a thing that doesn't fit than go back to all the folders and nothing in them that - " she stopped.

"Nothing in them that what?"

"That matters like this," Scarlett said, and looked up, and looked at him, and for once, for one clear moment, everything she usually kept behind glass was right there in the open - the wanting and the fear and the unfamiliar hope and the Scarlett underneath the President, all of it, simply present, simply hers.

Leo looked back at her, and something in his chest settled like something that had been waiting to land.

He didn't say anything. He didn't need to. He just held her gaze for a beat, warm and unhurried, the way he held the things he was given without squeezing them - and then he offered her the last pastry, which she took, and they sat in the warm lights and finished their cider, and didn't speak for a little while, and the silence was the most comfortable either of them had known.

The time moved faster than Leo wanted it to. He was aware of the schedule in his pocket - had been aware of it throughout, the faint guilty undercurrent of the evening - and as five-thirty approached he felt the thing he'd half expected: the reluctance. Not wanting to go. The awareness that the ninety minutes had been real, exactly as real as he'd hoped, and that the leaving would feel like cutting a thread before it had finished.

"I should -" he started.

"Go," Scarlett said, and it was clear she'd felt the shift, the way she always felt everything a moment before it arrived. "You have somewhere to be."

The way she said it was not a question, and it had a quality to it - not hurt, not accusatory, but simply knowing - that gave him a prickle of unease. But she said it evenly, and she looked at him evenly, and she did not ask where, and he did not explain, and the moment passed.

"I had a really good evening," Leo said, and meant it completely. "This bit of it. I really did, Scarlett."

Something moved through her face, brief and unguarded. "So did I."

He stood, and she stood, and he did what he'd done that morning, the thing that came from the new Leo, the one who'd stopped running from real things: he put his arms around her, briefly, warm, and held her for a moment in the festival lights.

She held back.

He stepped away. She let him go. And he went - carrying the warmth of it, and the guilt of the schedule, in equal measure - toward the part of the festival where Aria was waiting.

Behind him, Scarlett stood alone in the small clearing by the low stone wall, in her summer dress and her softer armor, and watched him go, and held, very carefully, everything that had been said and not said.

And she knew, with the particular knowing of a person who manages everything and has therefore learned to read the shape of what's coming, that something was not quite right about the evening - that the somewhere to be had a texture to it that didn't feel like just another commitment. She could not have said what it was. She filed it, as she filed things she didn't yet understand, under pending, and let him go, and stood in the warm lights, and told herself that whatever it was, she would handle it when it arrived.

The evening continued around her, bright and indifferent.

At the other end of the festival grounds, barely a quarter-mile away, Aria Blake was bouncing on her heels at the entrance to the games section, checking her phone, starting to glow with anticipation.

And in the garden district across town, in a small flat over a flower shop, Chloe Vance was putting on her best cardigan and having her forty-fifth argument with her reflection, and losing.

And in the Sterling residence, composing herself in the back of a car, Veronica Sterling was staring at her own hands - clean today, no garden dirt - and thinking about trying.

You've reached the end of this chapter